And I’m a 20-year-old college student, still trying to figure myself out in this crazy wonderful thing we call life!
Now listen, I am all about self love and self worth… but in order to really find out what those truly mean, I started to feel the need to make some changes in my life. For years I convinced myself that eating whatever I wanted, or doing whatever I wanted was how you were supposed to live your life. I felt that I shouldn’t need to change my habits just to try and fit in with the crowd, and that was partially true. I know I don’t need to change myself to look good for other’s, but I do need to make sure I feel good and comfortable about myself. After 15 pounds of weight gain, and a lot of poor decision making, I started to wonder who I was and what I was accomplishing in my life. Sure, I’m young – so I need to live it to the fullest right? Well, the way I feel about it is that you should take up great opportunities when they present themselves, but you should also stay focused about what lies ahead while also living in the now. So with that, I decided to start a journey of rebuilding who I am.
I started this journey around a year ago. I began as basically turning into a recluse for the summer. I spent the entire three months working endless hours at my job, rebuilding my car that I wrecked, and having major quality time with my family. I felt like I needed to start completely on my own again. I managed to stay away from friends all the while because I didn’t want any outside influences pulling me away from what I was really trying to find out about myself. I went from that beginning to starting to build new friendships, and trying to rebuild old ones after I felt like I was ready. From then on, I mostly focused on school and work – occasionally indulging in going out with friends and having a good time. Knowing that my days were coming to an end at the college I was attending… I needed a new plan, and fast!
I graduated the two year college I was attending, and ended up getting into a design school in California, based on a last minute degree switch I made. So far, I’m loving my choice, I just hope I can pull through the tough program and really make a living for myself. I’m about to make one of the biggest changes of my life by moving to a different state, not knowing a single person who I’ll be surrounded by.
So here I am, a month away from moving, and with a decision to make my last month, here in comfort; a challenging one. There’s still some lifestyle changes I plan on making, and with this online diary I plan to share my experiences through it all.
I’m not planning on really anyone stopping by to read this blog, but I just want to let everyone and anyone out there know that I’m doing this challenge not only for me, but for all of those other girls out there who are struggling with who they are and how they feel about themselves. I hope to inspire others one day as much as I may be able to inspire myself. So here it is…
This is Recreating Rhi.